Many disguises are available for emotional vampires, from bullies at work to needy family members to complainers who are poor-me. These people can make you feel overwhelmed, depressed, defensive, wiped-out, angry, or even worse, whether it is intentional.
Victims of emotional vampires can develop unhealthy behaviors and symptoms such as mood swings, overeating, feeling tired, and isolating without effective self-defense strategies.
These are the five most common emotional vampires that we encounter. Here are some tips to help you deal with them. You are not safe from these emotional vampires, which can come in any gender.
Type 1: The “Poor Me” Victim
This person believes that the world is against her/him. She/ he demands that people rescue them, listen and feel sorry. She will make excuses for everything, and give reasons why it hasn’t happened (and she expects it to be her fault). When it comes to your personal life, you are the one who is always listening and seldom get any kind of reciprocation.
Self-defense tips: You are not qualified to be her therapist. You shouldn’t waste your time advising her to get on the right track. You can limit your interactions by politely apologizing or cutting off the conversation — but don’t get too involved in her self-pity.
Type 2: The Narcissist
Everything is about this vampire. He is self-centered, self-important, and hungry for attention and admiration. He can be charming and intelligent, but his guru status may be threatened.
Self-defense tips: Be grateful for his positive qualities but be realistic about your expectations. He will not be influenced by your anger or demands. His motto is “me first.” You can appeal to his self-interest by showing him how your request will benefit his life.
Type 3: The Human Rollercoaster
The vampire might treat you as her best friend and confidante, and then launch an angry attack against you in afternoon. She is often aggressive and makes everyone around her walk on eggshells. She will blame her bad mood or hormonal imbalance. All of us have been there. Emotions can get the best out of us at times. This person is a constant excuser for bad behavior and doesn’t seem to be able to learn from it.
Self-defense tips: She is unpredictable and volatile. It’s important to set boundaries and be solution-oriented in dealing with her. Refrain from confronting her and refuse to be divided. Avoid eye contact when she rages at you. When you are being emotionally attacked, it is helpful to imagine a protective shield around your face.
Type 4: The Control Freak
The vampire is opinionated about everything and believes he knows best. He also has a strict sense of right and wrong and must be the alpha male. They are often louder and more aggressive than others and love to converse about sensitive topics and share their opinions on controversial issues. They are difficult to ignore and will often become hostile when confronted with opposing views.
Self-defense tips: Do not be intimidated or wooed. Be confident and don’t be afraid to speak up. Avoid getting caught up in the minutiae. If you allow yourself to be a control freak, you will soon tire of it. Just assert your needs and then accept disagreements.
Type #5: The Criticizer
The vampire is perfectly entitled to judge and make you feel inferior, shameful, and ashamed. They can appear kind and helpful while giving you backhanded compliments while making fun of your shortcomings. They can appear like a friend, but be careful. They will take your emotions and build you up, while also breaking you down.
Self-defense tips: Instead, you should address her misplaced criticism directly. Do not be defensive. Instead, express gratitude for the parts she has said that are useful. Send her love and kindness. She needs it.